A December advice to intended Couples
From
November till date, I’ve been receiving wedding IVs. Congratulations to the
intending “wed birds”.
I intend to write a simple message to the aspiring Husbands and Wives.
It should be brief, but may end up as a slide.
Dear Aspiring Husbands & Wives,
The untold advice is, in the bid to propitiate your wedding event invitees,
never make your wedding so capital-intensive that it’ll significantly decrease
your bank account balance. I mean, it shouldn’t destabilize your financial
stability.
Marriage begins after the wedding. Trust me, marriage comes with compelling
responsibilities you’d never be able to shy away from. If you spend your last
kobo to make a colorful wedding, you’d be shooting yourself in the leg.
There are several premarital buckets through which you’d easily spend more than
you could actually afford:
The first and foremost is trousseau (Kayan
Lefe). Typically, to appear classic before people you hope to appease, your
trousseau should carry stuff like at least 5 English Wax (Vlisco), Golden
Necklace set, a couple of Dubai Oudh perfumes, then the remaining “regular
contents” of trousseau. This should arrive at approximately a whooping
N1.7million at least.
Secondly, UNNECESSARY EVENTS!
Luncheon,
Arabian Night, Mother’s Night, Till Dawn etc. Organizing these events is one
hell of a thing. You rent an average hall at N80K for low key event, pay N50K
to a not-so-popular DJ, pay N30K to an MC, then another N30K to decorate the
hall. This one, you have not started buying rice, C’est Bon, Chicken and C-Exotic yet o. Roughly, just keep another N300K for one of these events.
Your budget is currently N2 million, Oga Colourful Wedding.
Thirdly, your bride is also hosting a separate event, mostly Mother’s Day. You
cannot just be feeling groom on high table without giving any contribution- you
no get shame? You simply give say, N100K.
The expenses for a Colorful Wedding are too much and unnecessary.
At the end of your wedding, both the people that would pass positive comments
and the ones that would pass negative comments will remember just one
thing- YOU ARE NOW MARRIED!
They’d barely remember all the financial stress you subjected yourself to. This
is why you should spend on only the things that are necessary for the wedding,
then save the balance for the marriage proper.
For the starting days with your wife, it should be a healthy living both
physically and emotionally. Create some comfortable and serene environment
within the marital home. Great meals with both starters and desserts, “spare
money” to fully fuel the generator in case NEPA are not supporting the new
ministry, etc. These are ways to start living.
If you spend more than you can afford in your wedding, you won’t achieve this.
Las Las, immediately the wedding is over and you enter your marital home, you’d
be “managing” as you’ve been “managing as a bachelor”. You’d be thinking of how
to pay back your debts!
This is not healthy, emotionally!
The newly wedded couple should both be emotionally, socially, financially and
physically healthy as they settle in their new blessed home! That’s what you
both deserve!
If you can also afford it, go for a honeymoon in a resort. An average one
shouldn’t cost you more than N180K. Just cancel that Luncheon asweah! 😂
I wish you the best in your preparations, and yours shall be among the most
blessed of marriages in sha Allah!
Good night!
Brotherly,
Ibrahiym A. El-Caleel
I intend to write a simple message to the aspiring Husbands and Wives.
It should be brief, but may end up as a slide.
Dear Aspiring Husbands & Wives,
The untold advice is, in the bid to propitiate your wedding event invitees, never make your wedding so capital-intensive that it’ll significantly decrease your bank account balance. I mean, it shouldn’t destabilize your financial stability.
Marriage begins after the wedding. Trust me, marriage comes with compelling responsibilities you’d never be able to shy away from. If you spend your last kobo to make a colorful wedding, you’d be shooting yourself in the leg.
There are several premarital buckets through which you’d easily spend more than you could actually afford:
The first and foremost is trousseau (Kayan Lefe). Typically, to appear classic before people you hope to appease, your trousseau should carry stuff like at least 5 English Wax (Vlisco), Golden Necklace set, a couple of Dubai Oudh perfumes, then the remaining “regular contents” of trousseau. This should arrive at approximately a whooping N1.7million at least.
Secondly, UNNECESSARY EVENTS!
Your budget is currently N2 million, Oga Colourful Wedding.
Thirdly, your bride is also hosting a separate event, mostly Mother’s Day. You cannot just be feeling groom on high table without giving any contribution- you no get shame? You simply give say, N100K.
The expenses for a Colorful Wedding are too much and unnecessary.
At the end of your wedding, both the people that would pass positive comments and the ones that would pass negative comments will remember just one thing- YOU ARE NOW MARRIED!
They’d barely remember all the financial stress you subjected yourself to. This is why you should spend on only the things that are necessary for the wedding, then save the balance for the marriage proper.
For the starting days with your wife, it should be a healthy living both physically and emotionally. Create some comfortable and serene environment within the marital home. Great meals with both starters and desserts, “spare money” to fully fuel the generator in case NEPA are not supporting the new ministry, etc. These are ways to start living.
If you spend more than you can afford in your wedding, you won’t achieve this.
Las Las, immediately the wedding is over and you enter your marital home, you’d be “managing” as you’ve been “managing as a bachelor”. You’d be thinking of how to pay back your debts!
This is not healthy, emotionally!
The newly wedded couple should both be emotionally, socially, financially and physically healthy as they settle in their new blessed home! That’s what you both deserve!
If you can also afford it, go for a honeymoon in a resort. An average one shouldn’t cost you more than N180K. Just cancel that Luncheon asweah! 😂
I wish you the best in your preparations, and yours shall be among the most blessed of marriages in sha Allah!
Good night!
Ibrahiym A. El-Caleel
